You are currently browsing the tag archive for the ‘dog’ tag.

Lost Dog Coffee Shop by ohmeaghan.

“In this world of change, nothing which comes stays, and nothing which goes is lost.”

Anne Sophie Swetchine


Today I lost something I really, really wanted and I found something else that I never, ever did.  I lost a piece of a dream that I had and really thought I had a firm grasp on.  And in the process was reminded that nothing is certain and we must always be prepared to weather change and disappointment.

What I found  was a dog.  Another one.  Well, to be more exact my husband found the dog wandering around near his work with perfectly manicured nails and hair and no collar or master to be found.  In all likelihood he was abandoned by some semi-well-intentioned owner hoping he would land somewhere good.

I felt a bit of kindred sensation–both me and this Rhodesian Ridgeback mix were dropped off in the middle of nowhere, completely under-prepared and disoriented, and with no idea of what the future would bring.  But both our fates led us to the essentials of life–we will both have food to eat and a roof to stay under while we figure out what life might hand us next–and he is going to get his mug shot plastered across town just in case there is someone looking for him (although in all likelihood he was abandoned).

I am constantly reminded of this simple fact in life, succinctly described by Operation Ivy in their song titled “Knowledge”:

“All I know is that I don’t know.  All I know is that I don’t know nothing.”

Whenever we think we know something, have some certainty, have something or some path figured out we get a sharp turn into the unknown and blinding humility.  I always find myself rooting back to the addiction mantra that I have mentioned before, “Let go and let God.”  Whether you believe in God, or the universe, or a force greater than the self and also part of the self, I feel that sometimes in life, as hard as it may be (and maybe especially when it is that hard) we have to just LET GO.  LET GO.  LET GO.  I am working to remind myself that now and trying to just let go and see where life goes.  Cause in truth, all I know is that I don’t know nothing.

Thank you Operation Ivy and punk rock for taking Socrates and making it palatable for all.  Socrates said, “I know that I know nothing,” and if he can admit that then none of us are ever too big or too small to be able to step back from our life and understand that truth for ourselves–what we know in any given moment is a pin-drop in the pool of infinity and it is good, if painful, at times to find a wincing reminder of that.  What I thought I knew yesterday was all wrong for the truth of today and the same might be said about what I will learn is true tomorrow.

Me and Gizmo (as Chris, my husband, has already named this dog we are definitely, certainly, not going to keep) came into today with truths that have expired as of today.  He is TEMPORARILY part of a new 3 dog household and I am part of something very new and unexpected myself.  Do you remember being certain of something that turned out to be all wrong?  And then were you able to breathe, reboot, and just let go of yesterday’s assumptions to deal with today’s circumstances?  I’m working on it as we speak–life the journey…always the journey.

Now, how to introduce three other dogs to the newbie–I am leaving that up to my husband, self-proclaimed Dog Whisperer Deux Joir.  We’ll see about that!

new puppy and pool 034New Puppy Sunday

 

Ok. So technically my birthday is not for another week and 3 days—yes, I am counting down with precision. And I am conflicted about how to feel about this particular milestone of a birthday. I am, now, going to unabashedly do what women everywhere (according to who?) are never mean to do—talk about my actual age.

 

Not my “health age” like they estimate in one of those quizzes you can take where, invariably, I end up being something like 102 years old with my chronic conditions, asthmatic tendencies, cholesterol issues since 7, sprain-able ankles, and so on. No, I would like to talk for a moment about my real, numbers on a page, rings on a tree, years on this earth, age. In ten days I will be thirty years old.

 

It is one of those random milestones that sort of sits in between childhood and midlife. I am not supposed to have a “Where did my life go?” crisis. I am not supposed to be curious about what I am going to be when I grow up. I am in some sort of age limbo, but at a number that is supposed to have some significance to it, some meat on its bones: a sense of purpose and simultaneous self-reflection.

 

Although some (again who are these people?!) would say I should be thinking about having children with earnestness and eagerness and hopes it’s not too late, I am perfectly content, for the moment, with my semi-defunct womb with tubal scar tissue. I mean I would prefer it didn’t cause me so much daily pain but I am not feeling a need to fill it with baby bits just yet. I think I have to get out of the stage, first, of calling newborns “it” instead of the appropriate he/she identifier. Even in babies I am in a bit of a limbo—which I guess, in some ways, suits this thirty year in-between birthday.

 

I am not, for perhaps the first time in my life, feeling an identity crisis or vacancy in my heart in that way that I would when birthdays came around. Thinking of a faceless birthmother, an anonymous birthfather, and wondering about (in a very weighty existential kind of way) how I got where I got in life—feeling a sense of duty to earn the life I had while also feeling a sense of bitterness from not knowing from whence I came. I am not certain what to attribute this shackle-free birthday sensation as it is entirely new to me. Maybe it has to do with starting my own family with my husband. Maybe it has to do with feeling chock full of identity and purpose these days. Maybe it is just the completely exhausting chaos and mayhem that has been life lately: full of moves, dogs, living alone in a new house with a new job. It is probably all of these things and maybe sprinkles of other stuff I have yet to explore. Maybe it is even pervasive, unending, medicating sunshine therapy.

 

TGIF=Thank god it’s Florida.

 

So amid the crisis of a birthday that is sort of crisis-less (besides the ominous certitude of being in a new decade of ages) I decided I needed to give myself a sort of corvette-of-the-thirties kind of gift. Apparently, for me, the equivalent birthday present to a sports car for the thirties is …a baby Jack Russell Terrier. My husband has officially dubbed me “The Crazy Dog Lady.” And maybe I am, but I’m an adult and I will own that title and wear that puppy biscuit ringed crown with pride. So here I am, perhaps insane, definitely deluded, 10 days from thirty and far from serenity with a three dog household and my version of a baby on board.

 

Her name is Grace which was not meant to be ironic but it is rapidly proving to be just that since we brought her home yesterday afternoon.

 

Dropping my husband off at the airport at 5:30am this morning and returning home to try to get a quick moment of rest (as it was a bumpy, three-dog- in-a-king-sized-bed, kind of night) and laying in bed with a baby Jack Russell on my chest, a Beagle/Pug on my abdomen, and a Pitbull/Lab over my shins I realized, a little bit, just how insane I might be—if not clinically then definitely in the area of canines.

 

Crazy dog lady—that’s me. Nearly thirty and dogful and proud of it. It feels pretty good. Let’s see what I say by next Thursday especially if I am still abundantly dog-full and husband-less. But I can say that thus far thirty is going to definitely be “The year of the dog” in my life if not technically so on the Chinese calendar.

 

new puppy and pool 013

 

There is no psychiatrist in the world like a puppy licking your face.

Ben Williams 

New Banksy Rat Mural in New York by caruba on flickrNew Banksy Rat Mural in New York by caruba on flickr

 

In case you are trying to discern if you heard me correctly, you did.  I did say ROOF RATS.  Along with various discoveries by land and by sea I have been making in my new home and various acquiescence to local wildlife in my shower, in my guestroom, and elsewhere I do not think I properly equipped myself emotionally for roof rats.  And I am not sure that one can. 

 

I am in a bit of a city rat, country rat dilemma–of my own creation.  I expect to see rats in downtown Manhattan.  I did not plan on finding them hopping and tight rope walking from fruit-filled palms to electrical wires like very large very ratty-type squirrels in my backyard. 

 

I called my husband in a bit of a panic last night to relay my crisis, after reviewing the nature of the Floridian roof rat to shack up in fruit trees (yeah in my backyard) and then use electrical wiring to get into homes’ crawl spaces and such.  He began to tell me a story about a possum in his grandparents pool–he has a tendency to try to trump my issue of vermin with larger vermin stories to normalize a place that is rife with vermin.  I know his intentions are good but the results are always inducing a double shot of chills and paranoia into my system. 

 

Last night I spent jumping at every scuffle on the roof or scratchy noise above, certain with every fiber of my irrational being that roof rats were clawing their way through my roof, about to fall on my face at any moment.  I was also fairly certain that my tiny dog, who had been playing in the brush below the fruit tree that evening, had contracted some form of roof rat rabies when she began acting spastically before bedtime. 

 

These are the things that happen these days.  Induced by spending too much time in a house alone, down a dirt road, in a sort of isolation in the middle of suburbia, surrounded by nothing but amphibians, roof rats, various bugs of varying sizes, and dogs.  And lots of mysterious noises.

 

I am a therapist but this by no means makes me immune to human fallibility, human weakness, human fear, and sometimes even a tinge of solo living paranoia.  I say this although it may seem (especially after reading this blog) like a kind of “duh” statement, but often I have experienced in the therapist’s chair this sense from my clients that I am mental health perfection, somehow by profession carrying some kind of automatic immunity to any life issues, emotional struggles, or points of imperfection. 

 

In the earlier moments of my career I felt that I had to be all of those things as some sort of indebtedness to all of the people who seek my help:  I had to be above reproach, emotionally.  I quickly learned that not only is that an impossibility but it is also a disservice to my clients to attempt that or attempt to convey that to them.  I am human and the humanity and the similarities we all have with each other due to our humanness is what bonds us and allows us to work together–in life and in therapy. 

 

I will be someone who panics at the sight of roof rats and dwell on it far too long into the night.  Even if I can dissect my emotions in the morning and rationalize myself out of complete and utter rodent-induced insomnia it does not mean it won’t be a weak point.  I mean, ROOF RATS, really?  Can you blame me?

 

Occasionally I envy the relationship that is easily attained between yoga teacher or yoga therapist and client.  It lacks the barriers of formalities and often overly restrictive professionality of a psychotherapeutic relationship and allows the relationship to build from the start as one of equality, humanity, and trust.  And through the body-oriented nature of the work allows an innate ability to tap into emotion without worrying about 5 page assessments and protocols that often get in the way of the point of things–which is helping people to feel and heal. 

 

So,a big thank you to this time of humbleness and humility that reminds me of how truly human I am.  Thank you to roof rats and lizards and palmetto bugs.  Although I will continue to scour the electrical wires at sunset for the silhouettes of roof rats attempting to launch a full-house assault.  I’m no city rat fool.

 

Pride makes us artificial and humility makes us real.

Thomas Merton (Trappist Monk)

 

Bansky Rat Mural on Canal Street by caruba on flickr

 

May 2020
M T W T F S S
 123
45678910
11121314151617
18192021222324
25262728293031

RSS THE EMBODY MENTAL HEALTH TIMES

  • War Horse (Caballo de batalla) Pelicula Completa En Español Latino October 31, 2019
    Ver War Horse (Caballo de batalla) (2012) Pelicula completa online gratisWar Horse (Caballo de batalla) - En un pueblo inglés, Albert, el hijo de un granjero, ve nacer un potrillo. Poco después, su padre lo adquiere en una subasta, y el chico le pone de nombre Joey. Pero la familia se arruina y no tiene más remedio que vender el caballo justo cuando estalla […]
    noreply@blogger.com (Unknown)
  • Los Adiós pequeña, adiós Pelicula Completa En Español Hd October 31, 2019
    Ver Adiós pequeña, adiós 2007 Online Pelicula Completa en español LatinoAdiós pequeña, adiós - Basado en un best-seller del autor de "Mystic River", cuenta la historia de dos jóvenes detectives privados, Patrick Kenzie (Casey Affleck) y Angela Gennaro (Michelle Monaghan) que buscan a una niña de cuatro años, hija de una drogadicta (Amy Ryan), que h […]
    noreply@blogger.com (Unknown)
  • Cuando Harry encontró a Sally Pelicula Completa Español Mega October 31, 2019
    Ver Cuando Harry encontró a Sally 1990 Online Pelicula Completa en español LatinoCuando Harry encontró a Sally - Harry Burns y Sally Albright se conocen fortuitamente cuando ella se ofrece para llevarle en su coche hasta la ciudad, entablan una conversación sobre la amistad entre personas de diferente sexo; la conversación acaba en discusión, pero entre ello […]
    noreply@blogger.com (Unknown)
  • Mamá Pelicula Completa En Español Gratis October 31, 2019
    Ver Mamá 2012 Online Pelicula Completa en español LatinoMamá - Cuando una hija despierte, algo sucederá...Ver Mamá Pelicula Completa Castellano Titulo original: Mamá Reparto: Votar: 0 Popularidad: 0.6 Idioma Original: Spanish Géneros: Drama Lanzamiento: 2012-01-01 Palabras clave: Revisión:mam 2013 filmaffinity ~ mam es una pelcula dirigida por andy muschiett […]
    noreply@blogger.com (Unknown)
  • Reuniting the Rubins Pelicula Completa En Chino October 31, 2019
    Ver Reuniting the Rubins 2011 Pelicula Completa Online en español latinoReuniting the Rubins - Rubins Lenny, (Timothy Spall) un abogado, tiene que poner su sueño de retirarse en espera cuando su madre enferma (Honor Blackman) le chantajea emocionalmente para reunir a sus hijos distanciados por un día de fiesta judía.Reuniting the Rubins Pelicula Completa Esp […]
    noreply@blogger.com (Unknown)
  • Los El inocente Pelicula Completa En Español Hd October 31, 2019
    El inocente (2011) película completa en español latino online gratisEl inocente - Mickey Haller es un abogado que se ha especializado en defender a criminales de poca monta procedentes de los barrios bajos. Cuando un día se le presenta la oportunidad de defender a Louis Roulet, un rico heredero detenido por el intento de asesinato de una prostituta, su carre […]
    noreply@blogger.com (Unknown)
  • L'homme de ses rêves Pelicula Online Subtitulada October 31, 2019
    L'homme de ses rêves [2012] Pelicula Completa GratisL'homme de ses rêves - Trabjo niños y exmarido, emma está...L'homme de ses rêves Descargar Pelicula Completa Gratis Titulo original: L'homme de ses rêves Reparto: Votar: 1 Popularidad: 0.6 Idioma Original: Spanish Géneros: Lanzamiento: 2012-04-07 Palabras clave: Revisión:
    noreply@blogger.com (Unknown)
  • Millennium 2: La chica que soñaba con una cerilla y un bidón de gasolina Película Completa En Español Latino October 31, 2019
    Ver Pelicula Millennium 2: La chica que soñaba con una cerilla y un bidón de gasolina (2009) Online GratisMillennium 2: La chica que soñaba con una cerilla y un bidón de gasolina - Lisbeth Salander es buscada por la policía, tras verse envuelta en el asesinato de dos colaboradores de Millennium, a punto de sacar a la luz un escándalo sobre el comercio sexual […]
    noreply@blogger.com (Unknown)
  • 24 Horas en la vida de Querejeta Descargar Pelicula Completa En Español Latino October 31, 2019
    Ver 24 Horas en la vida de Querejeta (2012) Pelicula completa online gratis24 Horas en la vida de Querejeta - El documental se acerca a la persona y al profesional del cine tratando de desentrañar una personalidad tan fascinante como esquiva y lúcida.24 Horas en la vida de Querejeta Pelicula Completa Filtrada Español Titulo original: 24 Horas en la vida de Q […]
    noreply@blogger.com (Unknown)
  • A.I. Inteligencia Artificial Pelicula Completa Castellano October 31, 2019
    Ver A.I. Inteligencia Artificial (2001) Pelicula completa online gratisA.I. Inteligencia Artificial - En un futuro donde los avances científicos hacen posible la existencia, los humanos confían todos los aspectos de sus vidas a sofisticados robots denominados Mecas. La emoción es la última frontera en la evolución de las máquinas. Pero cuando un avanzado niñ […]
    noreply@blogger.com (Unknown)

Categories of Writings